My frustration does not come from a lack of understanding. I mean let’s face it, we are all getting older, and our bodies are changing as proof of it. While I’ve been able to keep my weight under control, I have more gray hairs than I wish to admit, in addition to the hairs growing from places they really shouldn’t be. However, my frustration does come from the people around me lacking the ability to handle their changing body image in a positive way. For them it seems to be a never ending cycle of negative thoughts followed by negative words. And while my struggles differ from yours, let me offer you four universal truths to help you through.
1) Love Yourself As You Are—I firmly believe that you cannot grow and improve until you learn to love yourself where you are. You don’t have to like everything about your body, but you do have to love everything about it. So embrace your imperfections, stretch marks (yes, I have them too!), and love handles. This is how you look right now, so you might as well love you, right? To accomplish the goal of loving you, I use an exercise that I call “Love Me”! It’s really simply. You stand butt naked in the mirror, no makeup, no nothing, and repeatedly tell yourself that YOU love YOU! How long do you do this? Until you believe it and can walk away truly loving you. Nothing is a bigger turn off to everyone around you than insecurity, and there’s no quicker cure for insecurity than loving the person you presently are!
2) Stop Going for the Quick Fix—A universal truth I live by is “anything worth having is worth working for.” So don’t be afraid to truly work for the body you want. Popping weight loss pills, buying body slimmers, and appointments for liposuction are all attempts at quick fixes to your weight problems. And I’m sorry to tell you, the quick fixes are not going to bring about long-term solutions.
3) Stop Binging in the Gym and Purging at the Table—Binging and purging are never good!! NEVER!!! So don’t try to change your body image by ODing in the gym while only eating 25 calories a day. It’s not healthy, and anyone who tells differently is a liar and the truth ain’t in them! This is another short term solutions to a long term problem. Your body can’t thrive off a routine like that over a long period of time. Establish goals that are realistic over a lifetime, so that you can develop a body image that is realistic to maintain.
4) Don’t Obsess Over It—Live! Enjoy life! Love yourself! Don’t become so absorbed with your body image that it is all you think of or talk about. No one wants to be around you if food, fat, and fitness are all you have to talk about. It makes you sound shallow! Let it go! I promise you will be more productive at losing the weight as soon as you stop obsessing over it.
When making life changes in any area of your life, you have to think long term, and your body and weight are no different. Instead of trying to be skinny tomorrow, consider what’s going to produce healthy, long term results that you will be able to maintain over a lifetime. Make lifestyle changes, not momentary ones.
Yes, I am a skinny fat girl, and many of you may feel that I have no room to talk. But what I’ve attempted to do is share universal truths that work in all areas of your life. My personal struggle right now is in my finances, and the truths I’ve shared here are the same ones that I am using to make life long changes to my situation. So good luck, best wishes, and many blessings as you began making lifestyle changes to improve your situation.